I have been participating in a blog circle with some wonderful photographers who are also mothers of girls. Each month, we write a letter to our daughters to preserve thoughts and memories of this time in our lives. I treasure being able to do this for my girls and I love the chance to see the messages that my friends leave for their own daughters. Once you have read my letter, please follow continue on to see what Delania Waddell wrote to her daughter by clicking HERE.

Dear Avery and Alexa (but mostly Alexa),

September is often more the start of the “new year” than January, especially when you are in school.  And this year, both of you are in school!  Avery is in her last year of preschool and Alexa just starting.  It has left me feeling incredibly proud of you, though also just a little bit sad that the era of you being home with me has come to a close.

Alexa, you have taken to school like a fish to water!  I was a little nervous, because when we tried last year to put you into a program a couple mornings each week, you did not like it at all.  I am not sure that you lasted more than two weeks.  This year, however, you were off and I had to remind you to please give me a kiss before heading into the classroom without a second look.  I am so glad to see that you love it and that you are already learning so much.

Avery, you have been an amazing big sister and so helpful in getting Alexa settled into school!  You make sure that she knows where to go and what to do.  You’ve been really thoughtful and supportive.  I am also so proud of you for working so hard and being excited for your reading program.  You are so proud of being a Pre-K kid!

The first day of school, you decided to be such funny photographer’s kids.  You made it so hard to get a good picture of you!  I have a ton of terrible pictures like these:

Your dad drove you to school that morning and I followed alone in my car, because we both wanted to see you off and you always choose to ride with dad when you can.  I was so sad – you’d driven ahead with him and I couldn’t catch up – and the car had never felt so empty.  And even though I arrived before you’d gathered your things from his car, it still felt like the start of a big chasm.  I’d been so excited for you to start school, because I knew how much you would love it, but it is also, in some ways, the start of your life beyond me.

All I could think about was the absence of my little buddy, who would go with me to the grocery store or for a walk in the park in the mornings.  After weeks of looking forward to those few hours of “freedom,” when I’d get to be by myself for a few hours, I was suddenly heartbroken by the idea.  I missed you.

We were late that day, of course.  We had to sit on the porch for a few minutes waiting for your teachers to let you in.  I so needed those few moments.  We were able to hang out for a moment, be a little silly, and Mommy got to calm down and not feel the entire future in one little moment.  It’s hard sometimes, wanting to hold on, and yet being so proud of how you are growing up right in front of me.

You had a great day, of course, and you came home exhausted.  You fell asleep in the car on the ride home and I carried you upstairs to the couch.  Still small, still my babies.  And even though I am sure that I will have plenty of other moments like the ones I had in the car that day, I think that, as long as you keep coming back to me, I will be ok.

I love you and I am so very proud of you.

love,
Mama